Sunday, April 5, 2015

Here I Go Again

Natasha and I had great intentions when we decided to create this blog earlier this year. We had hoped that blogging would help us motivate ourselves (and motivate each other) to stick with it... to keep up with goals we had each set for ourselves at the beginning of the year. As you can tell, neither of us have kept up with the blog so far. And despite the optimism I presented in my last blog post, my dedication has significantly waned.

In my last post, I mentioned that I had recently fallen back on bad work habits. I have a tendency to do this. I want to make others happy and I don't like to burden anyone, so I take on more than I should. That said, I promised to be better. I promised to say no, and I promised to only take on what I could. And I failed. Miserably. March became a month of too much. I worked too much overtime, repeatedly staying past "lights out." I took on too many projects. I committed to too many things. Yet... the things that I should have committed more to? The things that I was hellbent on changing this year? The things that Natasha and I are blogging about in this blog? Yeah... those things I didn't pay much attention to at all. And I've been miserable, sad, tired, and angry. 

What the hell, man?!? Why is it that I'm able to forgo a social life, forgo a healthy lifestyle, and overly commit to work when I seemingly can't (read: won't) commit to something better? To things I am actually passionate about? Am I a masochist? Do I really derive some sort of pleasure from avoiding things that I enjoy?

About a week ago, I met someone who has completely dedicated their life to fitness. He lives and breathes it, and spends his free time helping others do the same. Talking to him and hearing the passion he has for the gym reminded me how much I really do love working out. I know, I know... a chubster like me with an affinity for cupcakes surely can't be serious. And a chubster like me surely is a chubster because I don't like working out... right? But... I love pushing my body to do things that I didn't think chubster non-athletes could accomplish. I love the feel of sweat on my brow. I enjoy watching my heart rate climb in parallel with the incline on the treadmill. Will I ever look like my new friend or his friends? No. Is that ok? Hellz yes! 

I make many promises to myself, and rarely keep them. A healthy person does not do healthy things as a fad - they choose to make their health a lifestyle. And yes - I said choose. We do not have to settle for mediocrity. We do not have to settle for unhealthy lifestyles that make us tired, sick, and depressed. So why do we do it? Why do we let ourselves fall to such dangerous and unhealthy habits? Why does anyone do things that don't promote a happier self?

I have many, many goals for the remainder of 2015. Some of these goals align with this blog, some don't. But... in an effort to be a happier, healthier Becks... I'm going to put a concerted effort into each and every one of them. I don't want this blog to be a cliche, rife with broken promises and unrealized dreams. I'm 35 freaking years old, dang it... Life is short, and it passes by quickly. I don't want to blink and miss it! Here's hoping I have a new blog post soon to update you on my progress. (And for the one reader who actively tells me to keep this up... thank you! This week's workouts are for you, my friend!).



1 comment:

  1. Way to go Becky! It's going to be hard but you can do it, one milestone at a time!