Thursday, February 5, 2015

F@#k This, I Quit!!!

I recently had the opportunity to watch footage of a beauty queen snatching the crown off of the winner's head and throwing in on the ground.  You'll definitely want to You Tube that later.  I found it to be both awesome and hilarious.  I was amazed at how well her sentiment resonated with me.  They say that when you have a negative experience at a young age, you get stuck there.  Arrested development.  Maybe that's how it all started.  On the outside, I am a fabulous, 25 year old (wink), grown woman.  Inside, I'm basically a 3 year old who is not immune from tantrums.  

For most of my life I have been a professional quitter.  This weight loss situation is no exception.  A couple of days ago I came to the realization that no matter how much I exercise, I can't have dinner and dessert at Chili's, beer, wine, fast food and whipped drinks on the daily.  I was obviously devastated by this information.  I was thinking about how a few extra pounds isn't a big deal.  I could just stop off at the mall and buy a bigger bra and get used to this "situation."  I'm not super obese or anything so it's cool, right?  

Then I realized that it's not about the weight.  It's about deciding on a course of action and making it happen. I'm rarely decisive and it's even more unusual for me to stick with a decision once it's made.  I did try it once. I took all of the baby steps necessary to get to where I wanted to go and it worked!  It was slow and hard and aggravating, but it worked.  I try to remember that every day, every moment, whenever it's necessary. So today, instead of switching my half-marathon to the 5K option or hitting the drive-thru for a #1, I will just continue to put one foot in front of the other (eyes rolling).  I only hope that I will feel as wise tomorrow.  

How do you maintain when it gets hard?  When you're not in the mood?  When your inner runner-up wants to steal the crown and slam it into the floor?  I am always open to suggestions.

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